A Slight By Any Other Name

Netscape Home The Netscape BlogNetscape NewsQuake

A Slight By Any Other Name — May 31st 2007

By Alexia Prichard

Distinguishing among humans on the basis of skin color doesn't make any sense. If you look at every person in the world, I guarantee you won't find anyone black among us. Or white, for that matter. What you'll find is a lot of brown and various embarrassing shades of beige (although, as a beige person, I thank Apple Computer and actor Jeff Goldblum for making that color even a little bit cool). In short, dividing up the population on the basis of skin color is about as productive as using SPF 45 in the Gobi. Sure, you'll be somewhat protected, but in the end you'll get terribly burned. Who, after all, really thought that keeping Tiger Woods from playing at Augusta was a good idea? Or Annika Sorenstam after him? The game is called "Golf" not "White, Male Golf."

Exclusivity of any kind has always made me nervous enough that I want to throw up: segregation by skin color, religion, sex, or sexual orientation. So as a gay person, I was doubly disappointed to discover that The Peel Hotel, a nightclub in Melbourne, Australia that caters mostly to homosexual men, was recently granted the right to refuse entry to "large groups of heterosexual men and groups of women."

Now, I'm as annoyed as the next person by roving bands of sorority girls, but the gay community can only benefit from mingling with, you know, the rest of the world. Equality would certainly come a lot easier if you sat the feral girl groups down and said, "Hey, we're just like you. We like dresses, boys, and makeup." Or, in the case of heterosexual men, "I'm annoyed by having to shave my face too. Let's drink to it!" We may not be welcome in their communities, but that doesn't mean that we should exclude them from ours. We can be bigger than that. After all, if we in the gay community spend so much time asking to be openly included as teachers, soldiers, and legally married couples, shouldn't we be practicing what we're supposedly preaching?

If you don't have any experience with gay culture, you may be surprised to know that it's so segregated. I was. The first time I went to a gay bar in New York City, almost 20 years ago, I was flabbergasted by the response I got from the mostly male clientele: disdain, shock, and outright anger. As I approached the bar, I heard an angry, effeminate stage whisper: "Girls??!!!" Yes, girls. We live here too, I thought. And we're thirsty.

As sad as it is for me to point out, we're like tribes, separating ourselves into male Hatfields and lesbian McCoys faster than you can say "pride." And that, I think, is what this new law is really getting at. It's attacking lesbians.

News of the Peel Hotel only makes this animosity worse. But before you conclude that the guys have Unreasonable and Hypocritical all locked up, let me introduce you to the annual Michigan Womyn's Music Festival. The 30+ year old fest has been catering to "womyn-only" since its inception. To justify this segregation, festival organizers cite the need to create a safe place where "womyn" can feel comfortable being completely themselves. On the one hand, I get it. On the other, I think it stinks.

Personally, I had no plans to fly out to Michigan so I could mingle with a group of sweaty, unshaved, and unbathed riot grrrls. So I wasn't particularly bothered by the exclusion... until several years ago. In 1991 Nancy Burkholder, a transgendered woman, was thrown out of the festival and forbidden to return. The "womyn" in charge seemed to be suggesting that this "womon" had deliberately crashed the event to make a point. In fact Burkholder had simply heard about the festival, paid the price of the ticket, and gone in to hear some music.

What followed was nearly a decade of controversy and protest. Finally, in 2002, the festival implemented what amounts to a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. All "womyn-born womyn" are welcome to attend, the festival's policy reads, and all others are "asked to respect the intention of this policy." In other words, if visitors are so foolish as to identify themselves as transsexuals, they will be escorted from the premises. Now call us the fairer sex...

Even after its court victory, the Peel Hotel has a fight ahead of it. I won't be at all surprised to hear that someone tries to challenge this law. Such policies are ludicrous and worse than embarrassing-they send a terrible message to gay youth. And there's no pride in that.

Tags:

18 Comments

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

Michael McElvaine — 11:19AM on Jun 2nd 2007

1. I appreciate that the writer also cites the issue of the womyn's festival when commenting on the policy of the the Aussie hotel. However, to take it one step further, the festival in its stated goal of a female safe place is still discriminatory against males. I remember many bars over the years where there were womyns only nites or other restricted places where only women were allowed. It always caused me to wonder what would be the reaction if there were 'official' men-only policies at certain bars and events.

I don't know the answer but discrimination in any form makes me uncomfortable, especially when it is within our own community.

Michelle Santagate — 11:21AM on Jun 1st 2007

2. What a brave person you are, to stick up for your beliefs, even when it may not be in your best intrests. Discrimination is ugly, even when it's working for you, and we can't shout about it only when we're experiencing the negative fall out. Forget that it's hypocritical to do so, it's down right stupid. What is allowed to happen to someone else today, could very well happen to you tomorrow. And then who will you run to? Who will help you? Would you even deserve help?
Great article!

Bette L. Nutt — 11:44AM on Jun 1st 2007

3. The Aussies have it right about so many things! In America we are being divided by religious fanatacism and propaganda. Heaven help our country! I agree with you Alexia, if we can all associate, live and let live, the world will be a better place.

Bette L. Nutt — 6:24PM on Jun 1st 2007

4. The Aussies have it right about so many things! In America we are being divided by religious fanatacism and propaganda. Heaven help our country! I agree with you Alexia, if we can all associate, live and let live, the world will be a better place.

David Halko — 1:37PM on Jun 1st 2007

5. (( [Alexia] Distinguishing among humans on the basis of skin color doesn't make any sense))
This was one of the worst things which came out of Evolutionary Theory in the late 1800's from Europe.

(( [Alexia] I was doubly disappointed to discover that The Peel Hotel, a nightclub in Melbourne, Australia that caters mostly to homosexual men, was recently granted the right to refuse entry to "large groups of heterosexual men and groups of women."))

There are really 2 factors involved here:
1 - Gender Descrimination: Denying entrance and telling someone they will not be serviced because of an inborn characteristic which is plainly observable is not beneficial to anyone.
2 - Thought Descrimination: Denying entrance and telling someone they will not be serviced because of what they think or prefer about sexual encounters is not beneficial to anyone. I assert this is actually more destructive since thought process is more difficult to discern. Should bisexual males be banned? How about males who do not have an afinity for any gender? What about males who do not like purple?
When laws are formed based upon what people "think" - these are very dangerous because people can not necessarily judge what is in someone elses head - sometimes, we can not tell what is in our own!

Marlene — 2:52PM on Jun 1st 2007

6. For an oppressed minority to oppress another is the height of hypocracy!

Yes, I thought it was nice for a couple of times to have heterosexuals to face the sting of "I'm sorry, we don't serve *your* kind here!", but when it's repeated it only shows once again the stereotype of gay men being horribly inclusive, partiarchial, and misogynistic.

When the gay liberation movement began, it excluded not only lesbians, but transfolf as well, and if it wasn't for pressuring these groups and exposing their hypocracy, they would still be primarily gay-focused.

The Human Rights Campaign for years refused to recognize transfolk not only as being part of the TLBG family, but refused to add gender identity to the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, but any proposed aniti-discrimination bill!

I'd like to remind my gay brothers that if it weren't the tranny hookers like Sylvia Rivera and Marsha P. Johnson you wouldn't have had the advances you take for granted which haven't reached us transfolk yet!

When you have gay men who claim to be "straight acting" and drive expensive cars and life in six-figure condos, I'd like to remind my gay brothers that in the eyes of the religious reicht, you're still a fa**ot to them and want nothing more than to see us all excised from the popular culture.

briankevinbeck — 3:56PM on Jun 1st 2007

7. All too true, reverse discrimination is bad. Only justification for separatism being perhaps psychological? Minorities can feel like "alien exile outsiders in their own native land." Hence may want their own Open Space. [I identify as paraphilic, homophilic not homoerotic, but whenever I see a straight couple on the sidewalk holding hands, it reminds me I live in a Foreign Country.]
Brandon

Reba — 4:47PM on Jun 1st 2007

8. As a heterosexual female working for a company that is owned and managed by gay men, I like to think of myself as a pretty modern and open-minded person. Although I've enjoyed working for this firm for over eight years, I have to admit that there's an underlying reverse descrimination present here. To put it simply; I am not treated as favorably as those who are members of the "club". It's nice to read this article and to realize that I'm not the only one that experiences this.

jen — 7:27PM on Jun 1st 2007

9. The ability to see and admit to your own faults is the height of maturity. It is how you gain the respect of others. After reading your article it appears the gay community as a whole has not yet acheived this. If I was fighting for something, I would want all the help I could get. If they continue to let pride push away support, they will find themselves more alone than when they began the fight.

emile — 1:23AM on Jun 2nd 2007

10. When all is said and done, it's not reverse discrimination...it's discrimination. To put these two words together makes no sense to me...but then again that's just me.

skwerlcrap — 8:21PM on Jun 1st 2007

11. Maybe if a few more of us followed the morals on which this country was founded we wouldn't even have this situation. Try reading the Bible and following it's guidelines.

BK — 1:59PM on Jun 2nd 2007

12. I am a 54 year old woman who has self-identified as a lesbian for most of my adult life. And I have never felt completely at home with groups of lesbians, or even gay men. (Actually, I don't do especially well in groups in general.) Over the past several years, I have more accurately, I believe, self-identified as bisexual. I haven't had a relationship with a man in a long time, and I'm not interested in one now. But I am, and have always been, physically attracted to men as well as women. And even though I never verbalized that fact much to lesbian friends, I always felt like I was being judged by the "Lesbian Police", like I never quite measured up. Finally, having reached middle-age, I am comfortable with who I am. I have some very wonderful friends of all orientations, and I am done worrying about pleasing anyone or trying to measure up to someome else's idea of what or whom I should be. All this to say, I have not found lesbians and gays, in general,to be any less close-minded than anyone else.

MF (no pun intended) — 1:37AM on Jun 2nd 2007

13. I have to applaud the comments by Bette L. Nutt. I am heterosexual, but my family is also subject to discrimiation. I am a 50-year-old male custodian of a 16-year-old adopted daughter of mixed origin. Discrimination surrounds us, from every angle. As a father, I would have to say her sexual interests are a little disappointing. As her peer, I would have to say that's her business. Each makes their own choices in life. I think the best thing is to find yourself, find your soul-mate, whoever that may be, and enjoy life in the privacy of your own home, however you find that enjoyment. Very well said, Bette, "Live and let live."

Gigi Pilcher — 4:05AM on Jun 2nd 2007

14. What I read was that the night club was granted the "right" to refuse entry to "large groups of heterosexual men and groups of women." I didn't take it to mean that they would always act upon that "right". I may be a little naive, a 56 year old heterosexual female American, but maybe there is a perfectly good reason or time that they feel they need to "enact" their right. Such as SAFETY ? Or, maybe gay-bashing doesn't exsist in Australia ? Please add to your list of discrimination: intellect,politics,
elitism, and age.

kaoscvn — 5:25AM on Jun 2nd 2007

15. I agree with Gigi, as an outsider I would have to look at the policy from a security perspective. It's sad to see discrimination against anyone, but allowing the hotel the option of removing people who are potentially dangerous to their regular clientele is fair in the (often ugly) real world.

gregger — 11:31AM on Jun 2nd 2007

16. As a Gay man, who has been the subject of harrasment and disdrimination in the past, I find the Peel hotel's policy reprehensible. Society in all its' segments must find common ground to co-exist. If one person is oppressed, all persons are oppressed.

As a twenty-something I used to go to the clubs in Central Florida and loved the welcoming atmosphere. I usually could be found with a group of Lesbians laughing and having a great time. There were always Straights, Bi's, Transgenders, and anything inbetween. We all got together for a fun evening. If there were persons causing trouble the management had the people 86'd from the grounds and a writ of tresspass if necessary. You don't have to isolate yourself from society at large. If you do isolate people, people do not learn. People who do not learn stagnate. A stagnant mind like a stagnant pond is a breeding ground for toxins.

alisin — 12:45AM on Jun 3rd 2007

17. This is and always has been the problem with the GLBT community...
They are worse than the people they are trying to fight. (for equality)
They preach equality but then they have more labels than you can bat an eyelash at... Gays and Lesbians are really the biggest offenders of this they openly discriminate against Bi-sexual and Transgendered. Not all but alot. But how can you ask for acceptance when you yourselves can't even accept.....

Kamel Tilmatine — 8:09AM on Jun 12th 2007

18. I'm a male language teacher in an oil rig owned by ConocoPhilips Algeria. I was assigned to this place to teach workers English and French. After few months my emloyer the Language Solutions told me that our client ConocoPhilips Algeria and Burlington is looking for a female teacher otherwise we wont have the contract renewed. Of course no one put it in writing; it has just has been said. Now I found my self in position of loosing my job because ConocoPhilips is looking for a feamle teacher to look at. what shal I do in this case?. kamel.tilmatine@gmail.com

At NewsQuake!, the Netscape staff blogs about breaking news of every stripe. Looking for context, commentary, and lively reportage? You’ve come to the right place.

RSS News Feed RSS Feed / Send us Tips

Featured Galleries